1717 K Street NW, Suite 900

Washington, DC 20006-5349

(877) 363-6376

HELPLINE

NEWS

Where is the Joy?

by Marcia Schekel

After 8 weeks of painful side effects from treatment, I looked at the CT with my oncologist to see the tumors growing and new ones coming in. I have felt crummy and have limited my activities and my spontaneous availability to friends. My husband is a great gardener — and I grow tumors. Oh well. Maybe I can learn to live with this news and still love my life.

I am learning about mudita, a Buddhist “supervalue.” This is sympathetic joy — joy at others’ joy. It takes intention and effort. It is the opposite of jealousy. Mudita practice works! It reminds me I am not the center of the Universe. (When I am ill, it is all about me.) So all of the good news of family and friends, community and neighbors gives me a lift, instead of sinking into ‘poor me.’ (Though I do still hang out in poor me occasionally … just not too long.)

Also, I have evidence of the joy in my own life, lest I forget. Several weeks ago I downloaded photos from my cell of summer moments and made myself a Summer Bliss photo book. I knew I would need reminding that I had many wonderful moments before I entered this study. I look at the book, smile and applaud my brilliance at doing this.

Now that I am feeling a little better, my practice will be to once again see the beauty in the ordinary, among the everyday grumpiness and complaints. I know I have what I need. I am cultivating gratitude for what I do have. Please no halo for me. These are just survival skills that I may live without making things worse than they are.

My spiritual director recently blessed me with this: “May you extract every drop from the grape.” And so this is my intention. She also sent me a Rumi poem to reflect on and share. And now this ‘advice from Rumi’ is yours as well! Posted for you with love:

Pomegranate Laughter by Rumi

When you go to buy a pomegranate, pick the one that’s laughing,

that has its rind cleft, so that through its broken-open you get some information about the seeds.

Listen for the laughter that shows the inside, that cracks the casket-shell and lets you see the pearl.

There’s another kind, an unhappy laughing like the red anemone’s that shows its inner blackness.

But pomegranate-laughing is blessed, like the companionship of good people.

Even if you’re a common rock, when you join them, you’ll become a precious stone.

Keep the love of holy laughing in you.

Don’t visit sad neighborhoods.  Let laughter lead you to the right people.

Also...

In Other News

mesothelioma job openings

Come work at the Meso Foundation

The Mesothelioma Applied Research Foundation is hiring! EXECUTIVE DIRECTOR Background The Mesothelioma Applied Research Foundation (Meso Foundation) is the nonprofit collaboration of patients and families,

Read More »

Share:

Facebook
Twitter
LinkedIn